| Have you seen the commercial for the new | | | | received the rebate. |
| Macintosh -- the one with the two guys standing in | | | | What mattered most was that I was able to work, |
| big cardboard boxes? The younger, more energetic | | | | at last -- if I didn't count printing. The new computer |
| guy, obviously a Mac, jumps out of his carton, ready | | | | didn't seem to like my laser printer, which it insisted |
| to get to work. The PC character, looking a bit | | | | on calling Flash Paper instead of LaserJet 2100 M. |
| chagrined, stays in his box. It seems he can't get | | | | Flash Paper had something to do with Macromedia's |
| started until he gets some additional software and | | | | DreamWeaver. Nothing made it go away, including |
| other equipment. So sad. | | | | dumping all Macromedia programs in the trash. |
| "And so not true," my daughter tells me. She bought | | | | I called Apple support. The tech was baffled and |
| a Dell, which came with all software she ordered and | | | | suggested I delete the printer. Then, he sent me to |
| was really ready right out of the box. No waiting. No | | | | Macromedia, who was also baffled and referred me |
| additional equipment. No hassle. She was using it 10 | | | | to HP. HP concluded that the computer was not |
| minutes after it arrived. | | | | recognizing my printer, and, since mine was about to |
| I, on the other hand, was not. I took my gorgeous | | | | die of old age, I should immediately upgrade to a |
| new iMac out of the box and plugged it in, but had | | | | new printer for only $330. |
| no idea what to do next. The computer did come | | | | Setting up the printer was supposed to be so simple |
| with lots of software (iTunes; iCal; iPhoto; iDVD; | | | | a child could do it. Unfortunately, I could not. The |
| iMovie; iChat; Garage Band, whatever that is; and | | | | computer was still calling it Flash Paper. I called HP. It |
| something that made little widgets fly all over my | | | | seems I did not have the correct printer drivers; but |
| screen), but I didn't need that. What I needed was | | | | through the magic of an HP Macintosh specialist, the |
| to open my old files, which I couldn't do because the | | | | iMac eventually recognized the printer, changed its |
| computer didn't have the programs I had been using | | | | name to HP LaserJet 1320, and managed to eradicate |
| and wouldn't use the programs I did have. It seemed | | | | Flash Paper. |
| I would need all new software, which ended up | | | | All that remained was to figure out my new |
| costing more than the hardware. | | | | software. My Web guru (not to be confused with |
| I may be a dyed-in-the-wool Mac person, but I'm also | | | | my Mac guru) came over to tinker with |
| technologically impaired. I called my Mac guru | | | | DreamWeaver, which was not allowing me to upload |
| immediately. Seven-and-a-half hours and $300 later he | | | | files to my Web site. After six hours of |
| had transferred all of my files to the new iMac, | | | | troubleshooting, she gave up in despair. I called |
| connected me to my e-mail provider, imported my | | | | Macromedia again. |
| bookmarks and address book, installed a king's | | | | Macromedia had been purchased by Adobe, so it was |
| ransom in software, and given me a fast tour of OS | | | | difficult to talk to a real person. But, by the third try, |
| X. "You really need to take a course in this operating | | | | I reached a very determined DreamWeaver support |
| system," he advised. | | | | person in India. She finally discovered a space in front |
| OK, that was expensive but worth it, I thought. | | | | of the hard drive's name (don't ask me how it got |
| True, it was a little more complicated than the | | | | there). Take out the space, rename the hard drive, |
| commercial suggested, but I was functional. That's | | | | reenter all the information, do this, do that; and, |
| what really counted, right? Well, no, not right. It | | | | poof, I could upload files. |
| would have counted if I had been functional, but I | | | | Adobe Creative Suite was another problem. It seems |
| wasn't. Since my zip and jazz disks wouldn't work | | | | Mac's new Intel chip isn't entirely compatible with |
| with the iMac, I now needed an external hard drive | | | | Adobe products. I stumbled around InDesign for days |
| to back up my files. So, I ordered a one on line, got | | | | before I gave up. I didn't even try Adobe Illustrator, |
| a lemon, returned it, got another lemon, returned it, | | | | Photoshop, or Acrobat. Instead, I signed up for a |
| and finally bought one for twice as much money at | | | | semester-long course in Adobe Creative Suite. With |
| the Apple store. That took three weeks. | | | | my senior discount, it was only $117. |
| Well, at least I had Windows, or so said another Mac | | | | While I was waiting to start my course, I fired up old |
| commercial. My new iMac was also a PC with an Intel | | | | faithful - Microsoft Word - and got back to work. It |
| chip. Pretty amazing, huh? That's what I thought. But | | | | was a heady feeling - until ... the screen froze and |
| I was wrong. The iMac didn't come with Windows. I | | | | would not unfreeze, no matter what I did. I broke |
| would have to buy it if I wanted it, as well as a | | | | down and called Apple. All Apple representatives |
| program that allowed me to switch back and forth | | | | were, of course, busy assisting other customers, but |
| between OS X and Windows. More money; more | | | | my call was very important to them. At last, a very |
| hassle. I decided to forgo Windows. | | | | humorless Mac tech disabled something called |
| The good news was that I was going to get a $179 | | | | Bluetooth, which apparently thought I was wireless. |
| rebate on my iPod, which, quite honestly, I would | | | | Apple continues to show the Mac guy getting the |
| never have ordered; but it had come with the | | | | better of old, befuddled PC, but I don't watch them |
| computer. By this time, I should have expected the | | | | any more. I want to write the advertising agency |
| procedure to be more complicated than advertised. | | | | that creates those clever ads and suggest that the |
| In order to get my rebate, I needed information | | | | copywriter might should use the product before he |
| from the UPC label on the original carton. | | | | does his next storyboard. I want to send a |
| Unfortunately, I had thrown out the carton because I | | | | registered letter to Steve Jobs describing my |
| had no place to store it. | | | | experience in vivid detail. I want to submit this piece |
| The Apple representative reluctantly agree to fax | | | | to PC World, post it on the Internet, and splash it all |
| me a form; but, since neither my fax machine nor | | | | over my own Web site. I want to plug in my old, |
| my fax software worked with the new iMac, I had | | | | decrepit "blue box" Mac and forget my desire to |
| to have it sent to Kinko's. There is much more to this | | | | upgrade. Worst of all, I want to admit to everyone |
| story, but the point is that, three months, four phone | | | | who uses a PC that they might be right after all. |
| calls, and several pieces of mail, I still have not | | | | |